Pictures

I have pictures!!!

No I mean I have pictures…. A lot of pictures! Plenty of pictures! Like so many pictures, I can do a #tbt for the next nine years or more.

Hell! I even have pictures of my exes… some of them… or maybe all… I don’t know… LOL!

So, I scrolled through my pictures recently and,

I noticed that I can remember events that led to the moment those pictures were taken. I can remember the days, the weather, and the events before, during and/or after those pictures were taken.

However, the most precious memories are not captured in pictures.

It is that 2.5 seconds dance with someone special, the crazy funny joke you crack with the family that gets everyone laughing, the moment you approach someone you have not seen over a long period of time, reactions to various good news, the knock on your door that changes your life, moments with friends that can never be re-lived, first kiss, last kiss, first hug, the moment you fall in love with someone and other crazy beautiful moments that are not or cannot be captured in pictures.

I know we have candids, but 90-98% of candids are actually plandids in the sense that, they are pre-planned.

Weddings, birthdays, ceremonies and other events are often planned. But, while going through pictures from those kind of settings, there will likely be a true candid; a picture that captures you when you’re totally unaware and instantly, you fall in love with that picture because it reminds you of that moment which is the most important thing, not just the event (Not that the event is not important).

I don’t know about you but most of my candids show me laughing or talking… Jeez! I talk a lot don’t I?

Lol!

So, even with all the pictures, I have to get momentual memories (is there a word like that? Okay, I don’t think so. I mean most cherished memories) from my heart or brain. In the end, God’s design is the best.

Talking about exes, is it wrong to have their pictures? 

I honestly don’t think so. I am friends with almost all my exes… I don’t have a problem with their pictures but, it is a personal thing.

Some people are completely not into all that. 

Some people will never remain friends with their ex and they will burn the pictures, delete em and all that. Whatever works for you!

Finally, someone asked if I would date an ex…

Well! A couple of years back, I would have said “hell no!” but now, it depends.

As humans, we are always evolving and growing, learning, advancing and changing. So, if after a while, we meet, talk and agree to try again, if we both are grown, and talk through the reasons why it didn’t work the last time and we think it can work this time, why not?

I would say no if that person is still the same or if I’m married / in love with someone else. 

There are a lot of testimonies like that but, I think it should be for the right reasons.

Don’t date or go back to your ex because you are bored, lonely, sad and depressed and you think another human can make you happy.

Uhn uhn!

No way!

Never!

You should be whole, complete, and happy with yourself, enjoying life before inviting or permitting someone else into your life.

1 + 1 = 1 guys, that is the relationship / marriage mathematics not 0.5 + 0.5 = 1

Being single is not a disease, it is a phase. Enjoy it, take the time to grow, love yourself and appreciate who you are. Dispel habits you can’t live with and prepare for the future. 

Be in the right place (place here is not a geographic location) and you will attract the right person.

As humans, we naturally have a void, an emptiness that can cause sadness and loneliness and talking from experience, only a personal relationship with your creator can fix that, not another empty human.  

Someone whom I am affiliated with once told me “I am sad, lonely, depressed, and empty, I need someone who can make me happy”. 

This person was in a very good place, good things were happening and I could only relate because I had been there. 

It is not the usual lack of fulfillment one feels when one is a terrible place or has a terrible job. No! This person is fulfilled, has a good life but feels empty and lonely even when he/she is surrounded by people.

The danger of thinking a human can fill that void is that nobody can fill that void. 

Then disappointment starts to set in after years of being married and the void is still there, then things fall apart, divorce comes in and there is yet another broken home, and two or more broken people.

Or maybe I am exaggerating… but honestly, nobody can make you happy! 

Make yourself happy, find another happy person and build a happy relationship.

Everything happens for a reason. Live, learn, love and be alive!

Make good memories, cherish them and share a beautiful story someday such that the joy from the memories will be evident years from now.

Enjoy the moment even when you want it captured. Don’t focus on capturing the moment that you miss out on enjoying and living it.

With Love

Rita_R